This year was my first Mother's Day! It was a fantastic day. I didn't realize how great an idea that holiday is until this year. What makes it so great is that everyone is celebrating together, like one giant birthday party. And I didn't have to do chores. I got to talk and celebrate with both my moms, one of my grandmas, my siblings, my brother in Mexico, lots of friends at church, and my own little family. I think what we celebrate is mothering everywhere, whatever that looks like, but this year I realized how special it is to have babies of my own.
I've heard this before, but this year I have a real taste for how my mom loves me. I love these babies of mine so much! So much that I've literally changed my life to fit what's best for them. I wouldn't just do that for anyone.
I've heard this before, but this year I have a real taste for how my mom loves me. I love these babies of mine so much! So much that I've literally changed my life to fit what's best for them. I wouldn't just do that for anyone.
I feel like I need to say out loud how much I love being a mother. I think we complain too loudly sometimes. I love making these huge sacrifices for these tiny people. I love staying at home and creating each new day. I am literally creative every day. I use my knowledge and skills that I've gained, I'm constantly learning new things from books, the internet and experience. I am still going to school, only it's more like I’m making my own classes and doing my own research. I am fulfilled. A big part of what makes it so fulfilling is that being a mother IS hard!! I work hard every day, except for when I'm lazy. :)
Anyway, I spoke for a little bit in church on Sunday for the mother's day program in class and I had more ah ha moments preparing what to say. My prompt was: What is the greatest gift you hope to give your children?
And I'm thinking, Well that's a big list:
Of course I want my kids to be kind, smart, and successful! My initial instinct is to make sure my children avoid the mistakes I've made and the hurt that comes with them. I want them to be better than I am.
But there are big problems with that plan.
A. I'll either be taking away my children's agency, or
B. They won't listen me anyway. (this was me!)
My children are not blank pages waiting for my pen.
They are children of God, just like me!
I am part of their stories, just like I am a part of theirs.
And God has a plan for them just like he has a plan for me.
I've witnessed firsthand what happens when parents try to dictate actions to their children. Either they rebel harder and faster, or (much more scary) they obey. I've seen people in adulthood finally question why they did what they did and followed in childhood. When the reason for obeying disappears (moving out of the house) they are suddenly "free" and have to start all over again. I want to focus on the WHY and try to be the best example I can be.
I know I'm a newbie, (so I think I know everything :)) but I want my children to know that I know that as long as I stay close to my heavenly father in prayer, He will show me the way and help me remember what I have learned.
He never fails me, I only fail Him.
I want my girls to have an example of how to follow the savior and the peace it brings me.
I want them to know that they are children of God, and that means they are good people and here to learn.
I'm here to be their cheer leader.
I get to be the one with all the love bursting out of my heart.
I get to partner with God and my husband.
And I'm here to have my children be part of my story.
They will influence me more than I will influence them.
I'm the lucky one.
And I'm thinking, Well that's a big list:
- Unconditional love
- Love of God
- Culture
- Food
- Music
- Reading
- A Mom and Dad in love
- All my knowledge
- Self confidence
- Education
- Social skills
- Kindness
- Good genes
- Athletic skills
- ….and the list goes on…
Of course I want my kids to be kind, smart, and successful! My initial instinct is to make sure my children avoid the mistakes I've made and the hurt that comes with them. I want them to be better than I am.
But there are big problems with that plan.
A. I'll either be taking away my children's agency, or
B. They won't listen me anyway. (this was me!)
My children are not blank pages waiting for my pen.
They are children of God, just like me!
I am part of their stories, just like I am a part of theirs.
And God has a plan for them just like he has a plan for me.
I've witnessed firsthand what happens when parents try to dictate actions to their children. Either they rebel harder and faster, or (much more scary) they obey. I've seen people in adulthood finally question why they did what they did and followed in childhood. When the reason for obeying disappears (moving out of the house) they are suddenly "free" and have to start all over again. I want to focus on the WHY and try to be the best example I can be.
I know I'm a newbie, (so I think I know everything :)) but I want my children to know that I know that as long as I stay close to my heavenly father in prayer, He will show me the way and help me remember what I have learned.
He never fails me, I only fail Him.
I want my girls to have an example of how to follow the savior and the peace it brings me.
I want them to know that they are children of God, and that means they are good people and here to learn.
I'm here to be their cheer leader.
I get to be the one with all the love bursting out of my heart.
I get to partner with God and my husband.
And I'm here to have my children be part of my story.
They will influence me more than I will influence them.
I'm the lucky one.
Love,
Lauresa
Lauresa