My last post back in October was kind of a climax in my study of body image and it's link with all of our problems with eating and dieting. And then I didn't write again for a long time… I've learned a lot since then and now I need to follow up.
This subject totally consumed my thoughts and feelings for a while. I discovered Isabel Foxen Duke first and totally clicked with her ideas that the diet-binge cycle is created by negative body image and it can only be overcome by allowance around food and serious body image work. I love her philosophy and it's absolutely true. Then I was presented with questions I couldn't answer very well. What does body image work look like? How does a person just learn to love their body? Especially when there is deep anxiety coupled with lies and hatred projected onto that body image? As I went along I found a lot of truth and practical methods - here are the main ideas:
Simple daily self-care helps you take steps toward a healthy body image. I.e. regular exercise, addressing social needs, working toward meaningful goals, positive self-talk, making a relationship with yourself a priority, etc…
Exercising the frontal lobe of your brain by practicing discipline helps to overcome addictive behavior and replace it with real happiness. Addictive behavior includes disordered eating and chronic dieting! For example, making a decision to do one load of laundry before sitting down to watch TV could lead you to other productive things and help make productive decision-making easier in the future. Whereas going straight to the TV when coming home often results in further related behaviors like eating five chocolate chip cookies or binge-watching Netflix. Or maybe even other addictive behaviors like drugs or porn.
I learned about an amazing body positivity culture and I love it. Check out thebodyisnotanapology.com for starters. I found Virgie Tovar via this podcast and I LOVE her (BTW Chris Sandel has a lot of great podcasts). She's totally real, spunky AND brainy. I'm sure there is much more out there on the interwebs. I love people who share about loving themselves and their bodies unconditionally - it allows others to do the same.
At one point I felt like I had to stop talking about body image because I'm an average size white girl with a below-average history of poor body image and zero history of dieting… And it's totally true, I don’t have a lot to add from my own experience, other than sharing the inspiration of others. But I still love talking and learning about body image. I think it's because a healthy body image goes way beyond quitting dieting forever. There is so much more to a woman than the way she looks and feels about her looks. Women accomplish incredible things and they have a giant capacity to care about others. If you love her set her free. The very obsession to be accepted by others and to find love can be what keeps her from becoming great. So when I love to talk about healthy body image, I'm really just loving to talk about helping women become POWERFUL.
After all this finding and discovering, I kept coming back to a problem with the answers I found. They seemed incomplete. It's one thing to tell a person, learn to love yourself, accept your body the way it is, and just practice telling yourself what's great about you. But it's SO HARD to do that. Especially alone. Especially when you are the only person trying to say something positive. Especially when all the people around you are saying the opposite.
I've realized there is a hard way to do life (by myself) and an easier way (with help). Help means letting other people in, looking for people that support me or even just the beliefs I hold. For me, help means letting my Heavenly Father tell me that I'm His daughter. Knowing I am His is far more powerful than any person, program or Pinterest quote. Having a relationship with Him (however imperfect mine is!) helps me fight back the negative and remember where I came from and what I can become.
The reason I stopped blogging for so long is because I let myself get overcome with negativity. I felt like there was nothing sincere in this world and I had no solution to offer. I got so angry with stupid diet culture and I kept seeing judgement passed by every person on every website. I felt like I had reached the end of my quest to find the answer to solving disordered eating and all I had were a lot of great ideas, not an actual solution. Well, I found the solution, finally. Instead of holding God at arms-length in my research, I accepted the idea that some things can ONLY be fixed by Him through Christ. And admitting that out loud gives me the ability to keep trying when there are so many cases of unsolved fairness in the world. I really believe all will be made right in the end.
This subject totally consumed my thoughts and feelings for a while. I discovered Isabel Foxen Duke first and totally clicked with her ideas that the diet-binge cycle is created by negative body image and it can only be overcome by allowance around food and serious body image work. I love her philosophy and it's absolutely true. Then I was presented with questions I couldn't answer very well. What does body image work look like? How does a person just learn to love their body? Especially when there is deep anxiety coupled with lies and hatred projected onto that body image? As I went along I found a lot of truth and practical methods - here are the main ideas:
Simple daily self-care helps you take steps toward a healthy body image. I.e. regular exercise, addressing social needs, working toward meaningful goals, positive self-talk, making a relationship with yourself a priority, etc…
Exercising the frontal lobe of your brain by practicing discipline helps to overcome addictive behavior and replace it with real happiness. Addictive behavior includes disordered eating and chronic dieting! For example, making a decision to do one load of laundry before sitting down to watch TV could lead you to other productive things and help make productive decision-making easier in the future. Whereas going straight to the TV when coming home often results in further related behaviors like eating five chocolate chip cookies or binge-watching Netflix. Or maybe even other addictive behaviors like drugs or porn.
I learned about an amazing body positivity culture and I love it. Check out thebodyisnotanapology.com for starters. I found Virgie Tovar via this podcast and I LOVE her (BTW Chris Sandel has a lot of great podcasts). She's totally real, spunky AND brainy. I'm sure there is much more out there on the interwebs. I love people who share about loving themselves and their bodies unconditionally - it allows others to do the same.
At one point I felt like I had to stop talking about body image because I'm an average size white girl with a below-average history of poor body image and zero history of dieting… And it's totally true, I don’t have a lot to add from my own experience, other than sharing the inspiration of others. But I still love talking and learning about body image. I think it's because a healthy body image goes way beyond quitting dieting forever. There is so much more to a woman than the way she looks and feels about her looks. Women accomplish incredible things and they have a giant capacity to care about others. If you love her set her free. The very obsession to be accepted by others and to find love can be what keeps her from becoming great. So when I love to talk about healthy body image, I'm really just loving to talk about helping women become POWERFUL.
After all this finding and discovering, I kept coming back to a problem with the answers I found. They seemed incomplete. It's one thing to tell a person, learn to love yourself, accept your body the way it is, and just practice telling yourself what's great about you. But it's SO HARD to do that. Especially alone. Especially when you are the only person trying to say something positive. Especially when all the people around you are saying the opposite.
I've realized there is a hard way to do life (by myself) and an easier way (with help). Help means letting other people in, looking for people that support me or even just the beliefs I hold. For me, help means letting my Heavenly Father tell me that I'm His daughter. Knowing I am His is far more powerful than any person, program or Pinterest quote. Having a relationship with Him (however imperfect mine is!) helps me fight back the negative and remember where I came from and what I can become.
The reason I stopped blogging for so long is because I let myself get overcome with negativity. I felt like there was nothing sincere in this world and I had no solution to offer. I got so angry with stupid diet culture and I kept seeing judgement passed by every person on every website. I felt like I had reached the end of my quest to find the answer to solving disordered eating and all I had were a lot of great ideas, not an actual solution. Well, I found the solution, finally. Instead of holding God at arms-length in my research, I accepted the idea that some things can ONLY be fixed by Him through Christ. And admitting that out loud gives me the ability to keep trying when there are so many cases of unsolved fairness in the world. I really believe all will be made right in the end.